Day 1
Chamber of Horrors Match
Vader, Abdullah the Butcher, Cactus Jack, and The Diamond Studd vs. Rick Steiner, Scott Steiner, Sting, and El Gigante
Halloween Havoc 1991
Oh boy here we go. This is one of those matches whose reputation proceeds it but can we talk about the participants real quick. Aside from El Gigante, everyone is in a Hall of Famer. Not even just WWE either some of them are in multiple Hall of Fames. They are above this. I know nothing about this match aside from the ending but goodness gracious, Sting, Vader, and The Steiner’s opening a WCW PPV in 1991 is just lunacy.
Holy shit Barry Windham was originally supposed to be in this match as well but he was attacked by the Enforcers in the parking lot before the show (Im not sure if Windham was dealing with an actual injury or not). Ok that bombshell aside, what is the actual match…it’s a cage match. But with instruments of torture! Spooky. The only way to win is to put one member of the opposing team in the Chair of Torture and flip the switch rendering them helpless.
First out from the babyface team is El Gigante. Why am I pointing this out? Because no one else from the babyface team comes out until after three of the heels have already come out. One of those is Cactus Jack who comes out wielding a goddamn chainsaw! In a sign of things to come Stings championship belt falls off during his entrance. Someone in the back should’ve called an audible right then and there but nonetheless the show goes on.
And wow what a show this was. I’ll say this up front, put this in a War Games Match and it’s ten times better. Hell of a lot easier to review as well. This is just insanity. You’d think that any match that starts with Cactus wilding a chainsaw would peak there but oh no it actually gets crazier. First of all, it’s damn near impossible to actually tell what’s happening.
There’s eight dudes all moving at the same, the camera is mostly positioned outside of the cage and at a distance, the cameras inside the cage can only do so much with how crowded the area inside the cage is and that’s before they lower the Chair of Torture into the middle of the ring. That thing is an eyesore, and Cactus almost got pancaked under it because he took a top rope bump while the thing was lowering. If it was moving any faster WCW might have lost the war ten years early.
There’s two coffins in the corners of the cage and apparently each contained some scrub in a mask that just occasionally interjects into the proceedings. So far we have eight dudes beating each up, two scrubs just lingering around, an eyesore in the middle of the ring, and Nick Patrick is walking around with a helmet like a special kid…and then a bunch of dudes in white come out with a goddamn stretcher…this is a fever dream disguised as a wrestling match.
Holy fuck. We’re only halfway through at this point. There’s so much madness that happens in this match but I feel like this is starting to drag on. So I’ll just leave you with this…watch it. I’m not joking, this is something you need to experience for yourself. It’s not good but it’s the kind of not good that is super entertaining. It’s like the Ball family on Miz TV or Shawn vs. Hogan at SummerSlam ‘05.
Day 2
Singles Match
Charles Crowley vs. Charlie Dempsey
Progress Chapter 135: Super Strong Style 16 Day 1
This is the first time I’ve seen either wrestle. I don’t know much about Crowley or his gimmick but a big part seems to be the word twat so he’s got that going for him. Dempsey is the son of one of the most respected wrestlers of this generation William Regal. He also looks like a sickly Roger Daltry.
True to his heritage, Dempsey dominates early when this match is just a pure grappling match. He’s so flexible and smooth it gives his wrestling a real Zack Sabre Jr. vibe, I dig it. There’s a really incredible spot where he goes into a neck bridge to break out of a pin and just becomes immovable. Like Crowley fucking stands on the dudes thighs and he holds the bridge. Fucking madness.
The match goes south for Dempsey following a surprise Enzugiri from Crowley. The match becomes a scrap and also kind of sloppy at times but I think it works here. Crowley has been grinder down the whole match by Dempsey so naturally he’s going to be tired and just throwing himself into anything that can help him win. Ultimately it doesn’t work and Crowley taps to an awesome STF Chicken Wing Facelock.
This ruled. This by all means isnt my type of match, it’s very old school grappling for most it but Dempsey is one of those guys that can make it work. I don’t quiet get Crowleys gimmick but he seems like a interesting wrestler, so I’d definitely be down for seeing more of him. Really good match and a strong start to the tournament, no pun intended.
Day 3
Singles Match
Robbie X vs. Aramis
Progress Chapter 135: Super Strong Style 16 2022 Night 1
Going forward a little in the night one bracket here. This is a different match entirely as both men are primarily high fliers. To the point that they earn a “flippy shit” chant in the first minute of the match. Allegedly it was a positive chant.
You can guess how this starts off. Both men display an array of athletic reversals culminating in a double forward flip. Aramis continues to do good Lucha things but then Robbie X pulls out some story telling. He works over the Black Ranger and slows the pace down. Nice touch…this doesn’t last long before Aramis Luchas his way out of a Side Headlock and nails a Batista Bomb.
The match continues to be back and forth with both men sometimes just saying fuck it and chopping the shit out of each other (Aramis even brings out a Violence Party.) but never forgetting their roots. In a small moment that popped me, Robbie pulls out a big Spiral Tap which still doesn’t put Aramis away. So he walks over, pauses, then kicks the bottom rope in frustration and quietly wonders what else he could possibly do to keep the Luchador down. Great spot.
If you know me, you know I was all in on this match. Nothing groundbreaking for the most part but still some quality high flying, spot fest goodness. Good work chaps.
Day 4
Tag Team Match
Lethal Enforcers (James Drake and Anthony Henry) vs. Kevin Thorn and Gangrel
OSCW: Beach Blast 2
This is actually an unreleased match from said show. Or I guess was since they put it on YouTube. During their entrance the vamps come out to Gangrels legendary theme song. Gangrel looks good but Kevin Thorn is waddling something fierce. Time was not kind to Mordecai, he’s waddling, he’s puffy, he’s gassed within seconds, it sucks to see.
Once the match starts however, he’s fine. Gassed incredibly quick sure, but he’s moving and bumping ok so there’s that. This match is fairly simple. The heels beat and cheat the faces building to a big comeback spot. It’s nothing special…until JD makes me eat my words and choke on my pre-conceived notions by busting out a HossSault. I mean sure he misses but still his form was impeccable. The miss gives KT the opening for Gangrels hot tag which ultimately leads to the finish.
Overall I’ve seen worse. They dont do anything spectacular for the most part but they didn’t have to. The audience wasn’t there to see an Indy spectacular and KT and Gangrel delivered enough of what they wanted to send them home happy which is the goal at the end of the day. I skipped the first five minutes or so which is just everyone fucking around. Decent match.
Day 5
Singles Match
Axl Rotten vs. Tarzan Goto
ECW Heat Wave 1996
Wrestling can be a well woven story filled with highs and lows, technical prowess, big moves, and a dramatic climax…or it can be two dudes beating on each other for a couple minutes. Take a shot at which one this is.
FMW vs. ECW in what is a surprisingly tame match by ECW and FMW standards. It’s still a drag out bar brawl but like…not? Very few weapons are involved. There’s a couple of table spots and a two chairs. Other than that it’s just Axl and Tarzan relying on their fists and feet…and legs in one case where Axl pulls out a Spinning Wheel Kick from somewhere deep in his playbook. Low on brain damage but it’s still classic ECW. Right down to the incredibly low budget camera work that derails everything for the home viewers once Axl and Tarzan go into the crowd.
I don’t know what to say about this. I really enjoyed it for one. It’s a short, sweet, and to the point brawl, can’t argue with that. They make the most of the weapon spots, and the ending is fittingly brutal.
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